I used to admire very overt, distinguishing qualities in people---how outgoing they are, how confident, how much they accomplish with their lives. Now I really value another person's eyes. Can they see beyond their own skin? Can they see my qualities? I admire a person who is person of vision, humility, and sacrifice.
Data: Female, Kansas, 36 years old, teacher & seminary student
Paul, I like this new feature on your blog. My tag line on my e-mail is: Sanctuary Center, A Place To Tell Our Stories. Everybody has a story.
I'm Fran, native Californian, age 67 (for 1 1/2 more days), divorced, three adult children, four grandchildren. I've been a lifetime seeker raised by an atheist father and a Baptist mother. I have church shopped since I was a child. Most of my adult life I was a practicing Roman Catholic but deeply influenced by Eastern mysticism--and in earlier times, by new thought. Now I'm going to a Unity Church, sometimes Catholic--and all I know is that I believe in God, I believe Jesus was one of the World's Great Masters, and that I am, in my own way, a Christian.
What I admire in others is very different at 67 than it was when I was young--or even in my 50s. I admire the ability some people have of listening--really listening and feeding back, without necessarily offering advice. There is a total give and take respect in communication. I like people who aren't afraid to look you in the eye because I do believe eyes are the windows to the soul. I admire people who go gently but confidently through their lives--who are engaged in what they do--be it work, volunteering, reading a book, or whatever. I greatly admire people of compassion.
I'm 44, female, and a cradle Catholic who declared free agency earlier this year.
When I was younger, I admired all the people who fit in so easily. I admired popularity and "coolness" and glibness and people who could throw a lot of trendy, pseudo-intellectual phrases around and come off as really smart. I admired people who could go on endlessly about all sorts of complicated ideas and theories. I admired people who admired all the "right" things.
Now, I admire quiet people. I admire simple faith. I admire people who really believe, even if they can't string three words together to tell you why or how. I admire people who get it. I admire people who don't give a rip about French film, vodka or Literatue-with-a-capital-L, but who aren't embarrassed to say they love Jesus and they are banking on the fact that He loves them. I admire people who'll take a Ralph Stanley gospel tune over the collected scribblings of "Sacred Tradition" any day of the week.
Yes, I read them all, but so far find that I want to stay away from commenting on them. So that it's just a place where people can say what it's like for them.
Shyloh, thanks - but can you continue to respect me when you see how every time someone asks a question or says something complimentary, I break my rule? But don't answer this! I am now taking a vow of silence. Well, maybe not a vow, but a pledge. Well, maybe not a pledge, but something that I like to tell myself.
i admire inner calmness and peace and patience in others. they are the rock to which i lean on. and people who are so content within themselves that they make you feel comfortable and at ease when you are around them.
Lynne, Female, 41, Philadelphia vicinity, A hopeful agnostic with Buddhist tendencies. Sign: Cancer, Turn ons: Candle light, Turnoffs: Back hair.
(Okay... enough of that)
When I was young, I admired quiet, deep, brooding types. Intellectuals who enjoy sitting around talking about death and the meaning of life (or better still, the lack thereof).
I think I actually believed that being depressed was a sign of itelligence. It's as if I took the notion of ignorance being bliss a bit too far. Happy people were kind of goofy to me and lacked dignity. Depressed people seemed deep and mysterious.
Now I find that I have much more respect for people who have figured out how to be happy. Those rare individuals who actually seem to know how to live without making themselves and other people miserable.
It's still largely a mystery to me how they manage to pull it off. But I hope to be one someday myself.
pual: thats a difficult question. for i admitt, i am abit weak when it comes to relationshiops. i dash whenever i find a person could be a nice friend of mine without trying to tackle what i love or what i hate most. i don't mind most of the time coz i go with my primarily insticts when it comes to admiring or cherishing others. and i guess thats the main reason why i have alot of friends, and why as well*Thanks to ALLAH* i have long lasting relationships as well.
when i start to consider some person a friend of mine, i put in mind that person is a good one for example, just eaxctly beside where i put in mind yet he is not perfect. so i bear till a time when i get to know, "NO! i had a wrong desicion!"
however, i never regreated knowing somebody, for s/he is yet another kind of the living creatures on our plants, and finally i discovered... :)
thanks for the question.. by the way: i am 20 a muslim girl and studying engineering.. and living in cairo-egypt :)
This was a great post, Paul. I admire you: for your courage in the face of disaster, your creative responses to hardship, and your positive demeanor.
But I'm not responding as suggested, but using it to open a conversation. We appreciate your comment to our Friendly skripture Study.
We called our oldest son, Paul Martin. About your age now. Perfect health as far as we know. Great kid.
Reading your story I have to wonder (as I do very, very often) why God has blessed (us) so richly in so many ways.
Healthwise: very fortunate. Now, at 79, I have a number of diseases, but a magic pill for most of them; otherwise pretty healthy; likewise my dear wife and our dear children and grandchildren.
How I would react to the kind of physical problems you have described? I just hope I could handle them as well as you do.
I have been away for 10 days..a trip to Dubai...Had nice time..I met few members of myfamily and some I had a heart to heart conversation...I felt in peace...
I use to think Im unlucky..now every day of my life is a gift of God..the future still frightens me..but Im a boat I sail into God's direction to where-ever the wind takes me...
It seems so poetic but the change in me is I more calmer and Im at peace...Day by day I seem to view an opne sky about my self...
Well I have many things I admore about others..depending on my dealings with me.....I admire those who accepted the wind of change in their life and adopted their life according to the sitaution that they are currently in..I admire those who have content in life as nothing else I see to be able to touch
I used to admire spunkiness, independence in people, those who lived their own lives with little regard for polite society. I admired them because I wasn't much able to do it myself, though I pretended.
Now, those I admire the most are those who know how to be a friend, those with the gift of knowing how to connect with their friends and sustain the connection over time, through thick and thin, sickness and health.
I recently got a card from a friend like that. She sent it to thank me for some things I did for her and some other people and some other things. What I really admire about this friend is that she would take the time to write this card & send it to me even though she didn't have to; I knew she appreciated the work, but she took the extra effort anyway, and gave me a beautiful, tangible expression of it that AI keep at my bedside as an affirmation in low times. I also admire her because I know she does this all the time. As a result, she has created a network of invisible means of support all around the planet, literally.
I have another friend who always knows how to ask the right question, the penetrating one that requires an honest search and answer. She does it in the darndest times when you'd think small talk would be the best your could have, but no, her Right Question turns the ordinary into an extraordinary occasion.
And I'm thinking of another friend who knows how to be a friend -- another woman, I notice. She is the quiet, behind-the-scenes type of person who knows everyone and everyone's business -- their struggles & joys, needs and gifts, and arranges what Needs to be Done competently and consistently. She's the one who, after driving her son three states away drives home in order to take two friends to the airport so at 4 am so they could fly to Guatemala to meet the children they hope to adopt. All without any fanfare or notice taken.
That's what I admire in a person: the ability to be a friend.
P.S. I found you through the Kwakersauer Skripture Study and must tell you that my first two names are Paul Martin as well. (The Martin, for me, was in honor of Martin Luther on whose birthday I was born.)
I have whole list of admiration to those who I met..it will probably fill this whole blog..
Let me mention one or two ( if time permits) ..
I admire my raising mother (step-mum..when she married my dad she took it on her shoulder to take care of me so lovingly. She played huge role of who I am right now because her kindness by passed anything else...She was the only one stayed till my dad too his last earhly breath...and she contiues to love me as same despite the fact my Dad is gone.Its amazing how pure is her love is...
My answer is pretty simple. I admire kind people who treat others the way they'd like to be treated themselves. I also admire Seekers, the curious who aren't willing to settle for easy life answers.
23 Comments:
I used to admire very overt, distinguishing qualities in people---how outgoing they are, how confident, how much they accomplish with their lives. Now I really value another person's eyes. Can they see beyond their own skin? Can they see my qualities? I admire a person who is person of vision, humility, and sacrifice.
Data: Female, Kansas, 36 years old, teacher & seminary student
Paul, I like this new feature on your blog. My tag line on my e-mail is: Sanctuary Center, A Place To Tell Our Stories. Everybody has a story.
I'm Fran, native Californian, age 67 (for 1 1/2 more days), divorced, three adult children, four grandchildren. I've been a lifetime seeker raised by an atheist father and a Baptist mother. I have church shopped since I was a child. Most of my adult life I was a practicing Roman Catholic but deeply influenced by Eastern mysticism--and in earlier times, by new thought. Now I'm going to a Unity Church, sometimes Catholic--and all I know is that I believe in God, I believe Jesus was one of the World's Great Masters, and that I am, in my own way, a Christian.
What I admire in others is very different at 67 than it was when I was young--or even in my 50s. I admire the ability some people have of listening--really listening and feeding back, without necessarily offering advice. There is a total give and take respect in communication. I like people who aren't afraid to look you in the eye because I do believe eyes are the windows to the soul. I admire people who go gently but confidently through their lives--who are engaged in what they do--be it work, volunteering, reading a book, or whatever. I greatly admire people of compassion.
Nothing is written in stone, we change from moment to moment. I am by the way from the great windy city. "Chicago."
To me life is but a dream. We live and move and have out being in Him. The Breath of Life.
Aloha
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
I'm 44, female, and a cradle Catholic who declared free agency earlier this year.
When I was younger, I admired all the people who fit in so easily. I admired popularity and "coolness" and glibness and people who could throw a lot of trendy, pseudo-intellectual phrases around and come off as really smart. I admired people who could go on endlessly about all sorts of complicated ideas and theories. I admired people who admired all the "right" things.
Now, I admire quiet people. I admire simple faith. I admire people who really believe, even if they can't string three words together to tell you why or how. I admire people who get it. I admire people who don't give a rip about French film, vodka or Literatue-with-a-capital-L, but who aren't embarrassed to say they love Jesus and they are banking on the fact that He loves them. I admire people who'll take a Ralph Stanley gospel tune over the collected scribblings of "Sacred Tradition" any day of the week.
Yes, I read them all, but so far find that I want to stay away from commenting on them. So that it's just a place where people can say what it's like for them.
Paul I admire that in you. Not many would. I have great respect for that.
Shyloh, thanks - but can you continue to respect me when you see how every time someone asks a question or says something complimentary, I break my rule? But don't answer this! I am now taking a vow of silence. Well, maybe not a vow, but a pledge. Well, maybe not a pledge, but something that I like to tell myself.
i admire inner calmness and peace and patience in others. they are the rock to which i lean on. and people who are so content within themselves that they make you feel comfortable and at ease when you are around them.
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Lynne, Female, 41, Philadelphia vicinity, A hopeful agnostic with Buddhist tendencies. Sign: Cancer, Turn ons: Candle light, Turnoffs: Back hair.
(Okay... enough of that)
When I was young, I admired quiet, deep, brooding types. Intellectuals who enjoy sitting around talking about death and the meaning of life (or better still, the lack thereof).
I think I actually believed that being depressed was a sign of itelligence. It's as if I took the notion of ignorance being bliss a bit too far. Happy people were kind of goofy to me and lacked dignity. Depressed people seemed deep and mysterious.
Now I find that I have much more respect for people who have figured out how to be happy. Those rare individuals who actually seem to know how to live without making themselves and other people miserable.
It's still largely a mystery to me how they manage to pull it off. But I hope to be one someday myself.
Idi, German, female 42, former times baptist church now belonging to a small church which in former times was lutheran
I admire honesty in the new friend of mine
and I have changed a bit
during the last days
since I understood what honesty means
I admired honesty in another friend of mine in 1985
which I totally had forgotten
but which now in this moment comes again to my mind
she was a believer
she told me that I was a hypocrite
Me, with all my reading the bible
and praying
but leading a life of sin.
I know she was right
So I decided to stop praying
and also I stopped reading the bible
because I didn't want to be a hypocrite
and sank deeper
(would have better done
to stop sin
than to stop my way of faith)
now after a 8-years-struggeling, Jesus has delivered me
and there starts a real striving for God
to fetch me out of the pit
thanks all this to him, but not forgetting:
thanks to this honest friend
which told me
You are a hypocrite
Be hot or be cold
but the lukewarm I will vomit
out of my mouth
sayeth the Lord of Hosts
pual:
thats a difficult question. for i admitt, i am abit weak when it comes to relationshiops. i dash whenever i find a person could be a nice friend of mine without trying to tackle what i love or what i hate most. i don't mind most of the time coz i go with my primarily insticts when it comes to admiring or cherishing others. and i guess thats the main reason why i have alot of friends, and why as well*Thanks to ALLAH* i have long lasting relationships as well.
when i start to consider some person a friend of mine, i put in mind that person is a good one for example, just eaxctly beside where i put in mind yet he is not perfect. so i bear till a time when i get to know, "NO! i had a wrong desicion!"
however, i never regreated knowing somebody, for s/he is yet another kind of the living creatures on our plants, and finally i discovered... :)
thanks for the question.. by the way: i am 20 a muslim girl and studying engineering.. and living in cairo-egypt :)
Hi Paul,
did you read my answer to your comment? in "Whole Heart"... God isn't only in Church...
?
Idi
Michael; 39.9 yo skeptic & empiricalist
Ch ch ch changes... with every breath I take.
Mo' to come.
You Rock Paul. ;-}
This was a great post, Paul. I admire you: for your courage in the face of disaster, your creative responses to hardship, and your positive demeanor.
But I'm not responding as suggested, but using it to open a conversation. We appreciate your comment to our Friendly skripture Study.
We called our oldest son, Paul Martin. About your age now. Perfect health as far as we know. Great kid.
Reading your story I have to wonder (as I do very, very often) why God has blessed (us) so richly in so many ways.
Healthwise: very fortunate. Now, at 79, I have a number of diseases, but a magic pill for most of them; otherwise pretty healthy; likewise my dear wife and our dear children and grandchildren.
How I would react to the kind of physical problems you have described? I just hope I could handle them as well as you do.
I have been away for 10 days..a trip to Dubai...Had nice time..I met few members of myfamily and some I had a heart to heart conversation...I felt in peace...
I use to think Im unlucky..now every day of my life is a gift of God..the future still frightens me..but Im a boat I sail into God's direction to where-ever the wind takes me...
It seems so poetic but the change in me is I more calmer and Im at peace...Day by day I seem to view an opne sky about my self...
Well I have many things I admore about others..depending on my dealings with me.....I admire those who accepted the wind of change in their life and adopted their life according to the sitaution that they are currently in..I admire those who have content in life as nothing else I see to be able to touch
this blog is really interesting, and encouraging .ill probably visiting this site often....thanks for sharing your words of wisdom...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
I used to admire spunkiness, independence in people, those who lived their own lives with little regard for polite society. I admired them because I wasn't much able to do it myself, though I pretended.
Now, those I admire the most are those who know how to be a friend, those with the gift of knowing how to connect with their friends and sustain the connection over time, through thick and thin, sickness and health.
I recently got a card from a friend like that. She sent it to thank me for some things I did for her and some other people and some other things. What I really admire about this friend is that she would take the time to write this card & send it to me even though she didn't have to; I knew she appreciated the work, but she took the extra effort anyway, and gave me a beautiful, tangible expression of it that AI keep at my bedside as an affirmation in low times. I also admire her because I know she does this all the time. As a result, she has created a network of invisible means of support all around the planet, literally.
I have another friend who always knows how to ask the right question, the penetrating one that requires an honest search and answer. She does it in the darndest times when you'd think small talk would be the best your could have, but no, her Right Question turns the ordinary into an extraordinary occasion.
And I'm thinking of another friend who knows how to be a friend -- another woman, I notice. She is the quiet, behind-the-scenes type of person who knows everyone and everyone's business -- their struggles & joys, needs and gifts, and arranges what Needs to be Done competently and consistently. She's the one who, after driving her son three states away drives home in order to take two friends to the airport so at 4 am so they could fly to Guatemala to meet the children they hope to adopt. All without any fanfare or notice taken.
That's what I admire in a person: the ability to be a friend.
P.S. I found you through the Kwakersauer Skripture Study and must tell you that my first two names are Paul Martin as well. (The Martin, for me, was in honor of Martin Luther on whose birthday I was born.)
I have whole list of admiration to those who I met..it will probably fill this whole blog..
Let me mention one or two ( if time permits) ..
I admire my raising mother (step-mum..when she married my dad she took it on her shoulder to take care of me so lovingly. She played huge role of who I am right now because her kindness by passed anything else...She was the only one stayed till my dad too his last earhly breath...and she contiues to love me as same despite the fact my Dad is gone.Its amazing how pure is her love is...
My answer is pretty simple. I admire kind people who treat others the way they'd like to be treated themselves. I also admire Seekers, the curious who aren't willing to settle for easy life answers.
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